Musings of a Whimsical Realist

Before anyone jumps ahead, let me clarify that we are still waiting for a final word on our pre-approval.  BUT something significant happened yesterday! A week ago Wednesday (the 8th), the CCCWA (China Center for Children’s Welfare and Adoption) returned from holiday, and our paperwork was waiting for them.  [Reminder: we are requesting 2 waivers to be able to move forward with adopting our little girl.]  We knew that we were looking at a typically two-week wait to hear back from them.  Imagine my surprise when Monday of this week (a mere 5 days later) I received a late-night email asking me to call our agency the next morning (no, I did NOT fall asleep easily that night!). The next morning’s conversation was rather neutral in that our agency had heard back from the CCCWA requesting more detailed information regarding our finances.  Obviously not the immediate “Yes” that we were hoping for but not a “No” either.  We were sent the financial form that is...

Most of the attention up until this point has been on the adoption process . . . the requirements, the loopholes, the stacks of paperwork (which we’ve scarcely begun), the trepidation, the hope.  As we are at the moment in the eye of the storm of the pre-approval process, I want to reflect on the emotions of adopting a child with special needs. For those of you who have been parenting children with special needs for years, please have grace, I am new to this!  I acknowledge that I am seeing the iceberg from above the surface.  To get a fuller picture of what’s under the water, I will probably have to feel like I am drowning.  And that moment hasn’t come for me yet.  Nevertheless, I do not take this lightly. I was reflecting this morning on some friends who are currently in the “trenches.”  They are fighting for what’s best for their children, fighting to give them a present and a future, fighting at times against overwhelming odds.  Some of them we...

“They’s organized.” ~Chicken Run I have a confession – I am addicted to organization.  I drool over the storage tub aisle at Wal-Mart.  I browse Staples for fun.  I clean out a closet and then open the doors a dozen times after just to soak in the organizational afterglow.  This addiction can affect my life – when I am faced with a stack of dirty dishes and a cluttered cupboard, the cupboard wins!  But time management is also part of the allure.  Functioning out of a home where everything has a place is just easier.  I rarely have to waste time digging through the house looking for something – I know where things are.  So OCD tendencies aside, I am going to share a few of my favorite organization principles. 1. Don’t marry yourself to a method.  What works for someone else may not work for you.  Good organization is ultimately about practicality.  Don’t be afraid to change an organizational method when it isn’t working! 2. ...

I get to write this blog post!  We have submitted the paperwork with our new agency to request our waivers . . . which you may recall means that WE HAVE FOUND A MATCH! After reviewing and returning the file for little girl “Iy,” I had come to two realizations.  1. That Hubby and I were both feeling strongly and persistently drawn to the idea that our next daughter would have hearing loss.  2. That in this part of the process, the main “currency” is timeliness.  So I began a new routine . . . every morning, I would sit down to breakfast at my computer and go through my bookmarked lists looking for new listings that might meet our parameters. On Thursday, September 18th, I was looking online yet again when I saw a new listing.  Less than 12 hours after it appeared online, I called the agency to request to review her file.  Late that night (after much extra effort on the inquiry specialist’s part to get us the information after their internet went down!), we m...

It has been almost 4 weeks since I’ve blogged . . . and what a crazy 4 weeks!  We finished off summer with a family vacation to the coast and then started 2nd grade with Firstborn and preschool with the twins.  Along with a bunch of new teaching opportunities and the fall re-start of extracurricular fun.  In the midst of all that, things have NOT been silent on the adoption front.  In this instance, though, I am going to tell you the end of the story first . . . we are basically back where we started, although a little more experienced from the detour. Again, I want to stress, we are not the norm when it comes to the beginning of this journey.  Most of the time, you complete mountains of paperwork for a country from which you qualify for adoption.  But since our hearts are still with China, we are reversing the process to find the child BEFORE the main bulk of the paperwork.  No easy task indeed. To make the new information a bit less confusing, ...

The wall will not be moved.  Although we have not received official confirmation from the agency due to a vacation absence, Child A is no longer listed on the waiting child list and Child B is "On Hold" as we were warned would probably happen.  It seems that our path does not lie in this direction. And so we take another path.  I have begun an inquiry with a third agency regarding a potential match (the other little girl I referenced in my last post).  A positive to beginning again the process of acquainting ourselves with an agency is that this agency is also a Christian agency.  There is a good measure of peace in knowing that we are working with fellow brothers and sisters in Christ for the placement of these dear little ones! As we wait for word from the new agency, please be lifting Child A and Child B up in prayer as they are in process to meeting their forever families.  The most difficult part of that whole process was not knowing the type of ho...

After spending a day and a half emotionally processing the fact that Child A (the little girl we were pursuing) was on hold with another family, I realized that I had more questions for the agency.  As I mentioned before, our information is on file if something falls through with her adoption.  Now I have a few more specifics.  It was one of the first two families reviewing her file that decided to go forward with the adoption.  The agency estimates that there is a 75% chance that they will get the approval from China for the adoption.  We should know for certain in 2-3 weeks.  IF (note: BIG if) something were to happen to prevent that adoption moving forward, we would get to review her file and would be second in line for pursuing her adoption. Also, as we were initially waiting to hear about Child A for over 3 weeks, I was continuing to look at other waiting children listings online.  There were two other girls that seemed like potential matches....